Just letting it all go....

Only two more days left of Blog Everyday in May (although I didn’t quite manage every day – what’s a girl to do)!

Today the prompt is “react to this term – letting go”

When I first started writing this post it was going to be quite light hearted but then when I was looking for an image to use I came across this little beauty:

 

And I don’t know it spoke to me in quite a profound way. I kind of felt the need to get serious. I can only apologise.

I met a man a while ago now and fell for him so very hard. And I learnt amazing things from him and he was wise and calm and he was kind to me even though he’d spent a lot of his life being cruel. He was never ever going to be mine forever, In fact he was never really mine… but I digress. So when the time came for us to move on it was really, really hard to let go. For both of us. And it literally took us another 6 months to let each other go, to go through the process, to stop holding on to each other.

But this is why he had to let me go, because by us still being a part of each others lives I couldn’t move on, I couldn’t grow, I couldn’t become the woman that he encouraged me to be. I miss him, I do, everso much – sometimes when its quiet and I’m alone the grief that he is gone overwhelms me. I can’t talk about him, few people even know about him (which is why this post was actually really hard to write). But through it all I never doubted that it wasn’t the right thing to do.

So now I move on with my beautiful and busy life and I’m more prepared, better equipped, more resilient, more aware of whom I am, of what I want. I have confidence in who I am, in what I can be, of what I can give. I am strong. I look around and I see people holding, clinging on to ideals, to partners, to friendships and I know that sometimes the strongest thing you can do is just let go.

Linking up with Jenni for “Blog every day in May”